Maybe I am a spoiled fucking brat but I really didn’t want to go on this trip. 

My family makes me feel isolated and they always have but I hoped this would be better. The lack of a buddy doesn’t make it easier. Neither does the lack of sleep. I get insanely emotional/cranky when I don’t get enough sleep to the point where it makes me wonder if I should make babies if I will be this miserable/brash when exhausted.

I’m whining about this here because I have no one else to fucking talk to right now. 

- A nice, clean, comfy place to live

- An uncle who will make meetings happen with important people for his niece

- French press coffee 

- A fridge with food that doesn’t make me sick because I’m finally figuring out my allergies and diet.

- OnDemand fitness section with pilates and yoga videos

- DVR full of House Hunters and Diners Drive ins and Dives

- The ability to go look at grad schools in different states

- A beautiful state that is currently green and the leaves are changing, but it’s also fairly sunny

- A hilarious family

- Mentors from school who are willing and eager to help me get a job/into grad school. 

- A super clean boyfriend (this is an important trait) who is my favorite person for many reasons which I will keep to myself right now, because I don’t want to gross anyone out with weirdness or cuteness or sexiness.

Aidan and Auntie

gpoy: I am going to brunch with my brother Jonah, his fiancée Judy and my nephew Aidan. Then Judy, my Mom and I are going wedding dress shopping. I am pretending that it’s way warmer outside than it really is. I want to wear less clothing dammit! Have a good sunday :)

gpoy: I love my nephew. I was showing him new amazing dance moves. :) 

The other day at dinner my brother told me that I have the power at work. As a female I can get any male coworker or higher up to do my bidding.

However, I would have to do one thing and this is what he told me: “When you walk past them in the hall just run your fingers through their hair.”

Me: “What?!”

Zak: “Yeah because they will have no idea what the fuck just happened but they won’t do anything because they will kinda like it.”

Then he told me this: “A few years ago when we had a Denny’s in town I was sitting at a booth eating my breakfast and this cracked out couple came in. Scrawny white guy and this Amazon looking black woman. Well, as they walked past me the woman ran her long nailed fingers through my hair and didn’t say anything. I just looked up like what the fuck? But then I had a tingle down my spine and thought “that was weird but ooh that was weirdly good.”

Yay congrats for Jonah and Judy! My family was betting on if he would ask last night because they went somewhere “romantic” for their anniversary. My Mom and I said no and my Dad and Aidan (their 3yr old son) said yes and my brother Zak didn’t bet (turns out he knew already).

My Mom has a feeling that Judy is going to want the wedding to happen this summer. They are planning on an intimate wedding in Hawaii with the close family (aka us) and a reception in Washington sometime after. I kinda wish they would wait because I know my parents want to help since Judy’s parents aren’t in the picture but money wise they aren’t doing so hot. Plus saving money for a trip to Hawaii will be pricey, but if that’s their plan then I guess I’m also saving money for Hawaii this summer? Hawaii would be so awesome but I just can’t feel excited when I know my parents situation. This was not meant to be a :/ post but it got :/ and now I don’t know what to do except end this now. yay weddings!

This kid made my Christmas.

gpoy: with my brother Zak. He’s going to a Christmas party. He found the sweater in the women’s section of Target and he hates taking photos. He’s borrowing my car so I made him.

My brother is flying in from Indiana tonight! I haven’t seen him in almost a year. This was taken last December when we celebrated his birthday at this dive bar in town. Judy (my other brother’s gf) and Zak with tequila!

My nephew is the cutest! It kills me.